The hallmark of successful partnerships is their ability to deal with anger and hurt feelings in a constructive, low-conflict way. Goldman's research points to the fact that couples who have been together for more than a decade still genuinely like each other is key. Chapter 16, Toolbox No. 4, "Lovingly Resolving Conflict," is a practical checklist that provides tips and perspectives to help couples resolve issues of relationship harmony. In addition, the books of Dr. Goldman and his wife , as well as that of Sue Johnson , provide a lot of practical assistance. I also found Dan Beaver's book
Beyond the Marriage whatsapp database Fantasy to be especially helpful for men. Re-nurture Renurturing is a key to relationship healing. Many of the needs of a traumatized child have stalled, and re-parenting is the process of addressing those needs. Throughout this book, we'll keep referring to the two foundations of these needs: love and protection. Chapter 16's Toolbox No. 1, "Resilience Intent Recommendations," also provides an alternative introduction to how CPTSD survivors may have unresolved developmental stagnation, and this toolbox translates those developmental needs into concrete goals , which can guide the survivor's efforts in the healing process. be your own parents
An important state of re-parenting is to balance being one's own mother (self-mothering) and one's own father (self-fathering). When a child's need for maternal love is met enough, he develops self-compassion from the heart. Likewise, when his need for fatherly love is sufficiently met, the ability to protect himself is deeply rooted in it. Self-compassion is the home of healing, and self-preservation is the foundation of that home. When self-compassion is enough to be a safe haven in bad times, a strong desire to protect oneself arises out of it, and living in a world devoid of these two survival instincts is terrifying. When we are serious about re-parenting ourselves, our healing process will go a long way.